All posts by John Sorensen

About John Sorensen

Bat-Fan Extraordinaire. Able to leap over plot-holes in a single bound, Likes: punching crime in the face. Dislikes: villainous fiends!

RISE OF THE TMNT Words and Pictures with MEAT SWEATS the Disgusting Sweaty Feral Punk Mutant Man Pig

Meat Sweats RISE TMNT figure front weapons

Another RISE of the TMNT post, this time a big sweaty manly pig with attitude. Of all the new RISE Turtles figures, this is the one I KNEW the moment it was announced I HAD to have it. It’s the figure that really ticks the right boxes of lewd and disgusting in that grand Playmates vintage Turtles and Toxic Crusaders style. If you’re not down with that style, then you can fuck right off.

Getting a look at this fella, and he’s got a big old pork belly – enough to make Bebop jealous any day of the week.

Meat Sweats RISE TMNT figure side 1

On his hands he has what looks like metal gauntlets. I have not seen any episodes with Meat Sweats yet, so I look forward to seeing how he fights and what mischief he gets up to. Because nobody demanded it, the comparison you all wanted – some sweet Belly to Pork Belly action. Get some Pork on ya Fork!

belly to belly action bebop meat sweats tmnt.JPG

I have my figure for now next to Bebop on top of a Garbage Truck from the Grossery Gang toyline mixed in with my other vintage and modern Playmates Turtles shit. He fits in pretty well with old and new figures.

meat sweats group2.JPG

Not only does he have a big pork belly, but a nice slab of pork roast on that back, I really dig his arms and the little minor details.

Meat Sweats RISE TMNT figure rear 1

This pig of course ain’t just any old Swine…..

meat sweats voiced by johnny rotten sex pistols

Meat Sweats is voiced by Sex Pistols frontman  Johhny Rotten. Any resemblance in entirely coincidental. What are you suggesting about our old man aging punk rocker? He’s a man baby, not a mutant!

Meat sweats comes with a meat mallet, and some kind of pink meat thing? Yeah I don’t know what the heck it is and the package is long gone suckers. So good luck with that one.

As much as I like the Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles line so far, if I had to pick a stand out figure – it’s undoubtedly this magnificent meaty sweaty bastard. He rude foul and obnoxious, the kind of pig you can bring home to mom and dad with a smile on your face. I can see some people picking this one up even as a one off as he is just so damn fun. GET INTO IT!

Meat Sweats RISE TMNT figure front 1



RISE OF THE TMNT Words and Pictures with APRIL ‘O NEIL the Actionless Figure

April Rise TMNT package front

It’s another Turtles toy brief blog, this time up it’s April ‘O Neil from the 2018 cartoon Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I picked up the fab four a month or so ago and was very impressed with them. I passed up the other figures due to lack or interest and lack of money, but now with some time on my hands, have picked up a couple more figures.

I’ve finally watched some of the actual show, and it’s definitely aimed at a consireably younger audience than the previous all ages shows. Despite it’s detractors (mostly older hardcore fans like me) – I can’t diss the quality of the show – it’s good fun. It’s bright colorful and trippy and really quite clever. I see shades of Genndy Tartakovsky and Kyle Baker in there. It’s a beautiful show. Like I’d watch it on a giant ass TV or cinema screen as it is visually stunning with lush backgrounds and shadows.

This new April is the most bizarre version yet, seemingly unconnected to other versions. Whatever they were going for, the figure translates into a very nice show accurate piece.

Too bad the limbs are so spindly that it topples over and is next to impossible to pull off any poses other than the one she is already in for the package display.

On the back we get some nice info about the other characters, and a decent shot of other figures from this wave. Playmates are consistent with this over a couple of decades with their product shot cross promotions. Weirdly other toy companies have dropped this obvious free promotional feature.

If you’re a kid, and don’t look at toy news type sites, how in fuck would you even know what other figures were out there? You wouldn’t, unless you saw them, or someone told you about them.  When I was a kid, this sort of shit was the stuff of playground legend “I saw a super shredder figure” years before one existed etc…. Like why in fuck would any company not have their cross promote toy photos? Even if it’s super small, better to be there in my opinion.

April Rise TMNT package back

Out of package, April has a really lovely show accurate sculpt. I don’t know the little dogs name but it is super cute and the colors are great. I got the green bat into her hand after a bit of trouble. The figure kept dropping it.

April Rise TMNT figure1
For some reason I want to buy Tacos

The second powered up flame bat April comes with, I could not get her to hold that one at all. Stuff some blu-tack in her hand is about the best way, but I just went stuff it – give the flame bat to another figure – it looks really cool.

April Rise TMNT figure2 green bat

So Raph has a flame bat now. I called the title of this post “actionless figure” as no matter what angles I put the limbs at, the damn figure just kept falling over. And the poses looked super weird due to the odd points of articulation that don’t mimic human angles of movement at all. If you’ve ever handled a McFarlane Toys movie maniacs type figure, you know what I mean. It looks good in that one set pose, and every other pose is like arm broken 90 degrees of freakdom take me to the damn hospital before it drops off.

But this is a super cheap figure, with a nice sculpt, great paint and overall the quality is good. It’s just the thin limbs make it so topsy fall-overy. I can say the same of any of the turtles, or many 5″ and 6″ scale toys really.

Overall, it’s good value for money, looks the damn business and after seeing previews for new stuff at the recent toy expos online – I’m all in on this line. But still cherry picking the main cast, and the figures I like. I won’t buy just anything and everything.

april 1

That’s it folks. We’re done until next time.


If there’s one thing I love more than Transformers, it’s amazing fan customs… of Transformers. This post will be short and sweet so let’s get moving.



First up, the most unlikely of customs, yes it’s Transformers Prime redone from CW toys. The aesthetics should not work at all, yet there they are and damn they look good.

transformers prime decepticons cw customs



Next off the block it’s some Machine Wars Autobots by Cheetimus Primal. Some truly stand out bots here and a fun combined mode. You can find his full gallery over at Cheetimus Primal’s Website.


machine wars autobots cw customs


machine wars autobots combined optimus cheet 500



I don’t know of a proper name for this this wicked combo of Sky Lynx, Hound and custom Warpath, so I’m calling him Sky Max. He’s got some Jetfire style backpack exhaust thingies too and looks sweet with highly detailed highlights and finish.

sky max



Beast Wars Magnaboss, talk about from out of left field. This wicked custom is from another regular TFW2005 forum dude. You can find his cool customs on Pinterest right here.

magnaboss bots 1.jpg

Check out that combined mode! That’s something special, just an awesome looking fan combiner.

beast wars combiner custom magnaboss moggyzpartuss


I’d never seen these wicked Hot Rod and Ultra Magnus custom combiners until I created this article. So I have no idea who made them, if you do please feel free to leave a comment and let me know. They look fantastic I think you’ll agree.

hot rod ultra magnus combiner cw customs transformers



Another TFW2005 user created one of my all time favourite fan customs. Dude who goes by Autobot00  – created this cool team of combining Junkions. Never thought I’d ever see a Junkion combiner. I’m trying to pick up some Wreck-Gars to at least mimic this one myself.

junkion combiner custom 1

It’s Silverbolt, or he used to be – and now he is a very cool Junk-biner?

junkion combiner custom 2

Not content with just the combiner, Autobot 00 also has his minions for team junk. So damn cool!

junkion combiner custom 3 transformers



Now we get to one of the earliest fan customs that appeared several years ago on social media and fan forum sites. It’s done the rounds, everybody has seen it – but that don’t make it any less spectacular. It’s a god damn CRIME against Robomanity that Hasbro never made this one themselves – such an obvious choice of redecos (seekers / rainmakers etc) and the head is not even modified, it’s just painted differently.


starscream combiner custom seekers cw transformers

In this mock up, you can see how the crown and front chest parts for Starscream were already there on the Cyclonus toy. Making it look like it was probable that Starscream was meant to be a redeco of the Cyclonus toy. The crown can be explained as Galvatron’s head crest, but Galvatron’s chest never looked like a Seeker jet, COME ON!

starscream cw custom combiner



As great as the others are, they are mostly repaints and a new head here and there, or some minor bits. This Raiden set is like a whole retooling of existing CW toys. At first you have to wonder if this was scratch built, because how the hell did they pull this off? I don’t know if they sourced parts from other toys, or molded new parts themselves (or more likely 3D printed) but fuck me dead, just LOOK at this beastly bot!

raiden train modes transformers combiner wars

Train modes look great, bot modes look great! Well detailed, the distinct color schemes and all.

raiden combiner bot modes wars transformers

….and then they turn into this mother! It’s god damn Raiden! Another design that hasbro/takara could easily steal back and do themselves if you ask me (and it might happen yet) We are down to the last few main combiners yet to be remade, so it could happen. But just pause and take it in, this is a a BEAUTIFUL combiner, a loving crafted project that must have taken forever to complete.

combiner wars transformers raiden